—it is always the people
It is always the people we meet, the love we share, the connection we make, the experience we have. It is never about the outcome we achieve.
“You never forget who shows up for you, the people who help you on your path and the way someone makes you feel."
—Shari Ingleton
It feels like we have it all backwards.
We set goals, we make commitments, we create our homes and lives. We immerse ourselves in our careers, in our businesses.
The physical reality we live in is very real and it is very beautiful. We can see it, we can feel it, we can touch it. We can measure it, live it, breathe it, hold it in our hands.
The irony of all of this is not the things or the places, the homes, the profit margins, the corporate ladder — what truly matters is the people. The people we meet, the experiences we share, the love that grows, the lessons we learn.
For it is just a moment in time. A snapshot. A memory made.
When outcomes are unknown we cling and crave certainty so deeply.
There is an invisible clock ticking somewhere that we cannot see. For us all. Life is such a gift and we waste it so often worrying about things that we cannot change the outcomes that our out of our hands.
As we grow older and wiser, we are often put back into similar situations. Old places that are just the same as we left them — yet we are so different. The people there sometimes may be the same, but we are different.
At the moment, one of my sons is in a football pathway. I have been here before with another son. I am sitting at the same oval. The team colours and logos are the same. The oval is the same. The program is the same. And yet, nothing about it feels the same.
The people are different. The experience so different. The coaches that once helped my older son so much to become the man he is today have moved onto bigger and better coaching roles and career opportunities. The friends he made and shared his journey with have all moved up to higher grades, so while the place, the oval, the program, the club are all still the same.
A place where I once felt so connected to, now is a clean slate.
New memories will be made here now, new connections, new coaches, new people we will meet. This experience although similar in many ways, will be completely different.
It has been just one of the changing life circumstances that has reminded me that outcomes don’t matter.
People matter.
The ones you meet along the way and share this part of your life with.
They become somehow entrenched into your heart that years later you may go back to the exact same place, yet it will all feel so different.
We are all growing, evolving, changing and transforming each and every day. Nothing stays the same for too long. There is an impermanence to it all. Life is constantly ebbing and flowing, challenging and changing us, in ways we might be able to know but in so many other ways that we are creating core memories in our hearts.
You never forget who shows up for you.
You never forget how people make you feel.
You never forget the people who made your journey a little lighter, a lot brighter and held your heart when you needed it most.
There is a saying that you only truly value a moment when it becomes a memory you can’t make or experience again. And it is so true. What I would give to be back here with my older son, not to change anything just to soak it in again. What I would give to be back with my little boys, again not to change anything, just to soak it in again.
All too soon whatever it is that is right in front of us, challenging us, expanding us, testing us, making us feel so full of love and joy, will pass us too.
We won’t really even realise what is happening, that is just how life goes.
So soak up the moment that we have right here and now. As I was watching my son play basketball on the weekend, I recorded his warm up. Not because I wanted to share on instagram how amazing he is (he is really amazing by the way!) but because I wanted to soak it all in. I never want to forget how he warms up, how he sets himself up for the game, how he is — just as he is right here and now.
As another year draws to a close, it has me reflecting on all the challenges it has brought about. All the changes that have been made. All the love that has been shared. All the moments that made it wonderful. Most of all it has me reflecting on all the people that I got to share it with this year.
People matter.
Love matters.
The rest truly is just stuff and when we can turn down the volume of the noisy world and connect back to our hearts, we know so deeply that where we are right now is the only place we need to be. Soaking up the people who love us and that we love, basking in the joys that are in our life right here and now.
Grateful for all the incredible people we know, love and share our lives with. Excited for all the experiences that lie ahead. Life is one big adventure, one twisty and twirly journey that is full of duality.
How lucky we are to be who we are, in this moment, at this time.
How lucky we are to love the way we do.
How lucky we are to share the experiences we share.
How lucky we are to connect, support and nurture each other.
Love is all that remains.
The places stay the same but it is the people we share it all with that truly matter.
These people are etched in our hearts forever and always.
No matter what changes or unfolds next, the love will always remain.
Sending so much love,
